happiest news!

If you're not on facebook or instagram then you're totally out of the loop.

Cuz I'm pregnant, peeps!

Can you even believe it!?

Cuz I can't!
We've waited 2 1/2 LONG years for this baby!!

I don't know who is more excited...me, Madden, or Randy!

Or my parents, who've prayed for so long and so hard for us to have another baby.

Or my sisters, who were waiting on pins and needles for the phone call from me on our test results day.

Or my bestie, who cried over the phone when I told her.

Or my grandma, who had just about the cutest and sweetest reaction when I called her to tell her...so cute and sweet that it made me cry all over again!

I mean, freak, I am gonna start crying all over again right now just typing this!

Infertility is the hardest thing I have ever been through.

But it has also taught me so much.

And for that, I am grateful.

It has taught me to count my blessings and be thankful for what I have.

It has taught me to not take one day or second for granted with the son I already have.

It has taught me to have more patience as a mother and to try everyday to be a better mother.

It has taught me to rely more on the Lord and the power of the priesthood.

It has taught me to feel more empathy and love for others and the trials they are going through.

It has taught me to remember that the Lord knows whats best for us, better than we do for ourselves.

It has taught me that sometimes our greatest happiness and joys come at the end of our most bitter trials. 

And that the bitter just makes the sweet all the more sweet.

In Elder Worthlin's famous talk, "Come What May and Love It," he says:

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude."

And man, have there been some tears of rejoicing over here!

I sobbed out loud like a baby when I got the phone call from the Drs office that we were indeed pregnant.

And then I cried hysterically in my husbands arms as we hugged each other the second I hung up the phone.

And then when I thought I'd composed myself enough to make a few phone calls, I called my parents and cried so hard that my mom was afraid it was bad news when she heard me.

And then after phone calls had been made to my parents, my sisters, my grandparents, and a couple of my closest friends who knew we were getting our test results that day, I wiped away my happy tears and went out to dinner with my little family of 3 (soon to be 4!) to celebrate.

And then I might've cried some more in the car on the way to the restaurant.

You'd think I was all cried out, but I pretty much cry anytime I think about that phone call.
Anytime I see and hear this little baby's heartbeat fluttering on the screen at every ultrasound.

Anytime I imagine holding this baby in my arms.

Anytime I think about all we've gone through to get to this point.

I cry.

Happy tears.

Tears of rejoicing and gratitude.

And its more than made up for all the sad tears I've cried over the past 2 1/2 years.

I'm not sure if Heavenly Father has a specific purpose for having us wait for this baby for so long, or if the purpose was simply to give me an opportunity to grow and learn and to strengthen my faith in Him and my relationship with Him.
But whatever the purpose, I am thankful for the struggle because it has made the reward at the end mean all the more to me.
More than I can even say in words....